Tuesday, December 22, 2009

bas crazy

THE REAL STREET FIGHTER. I don't know if this is old news or not. I'm talking about Bas Rutten's Lethal Street Fighting Self Defense System.

Me and Lauren watched Parts I and II in their entirety tonight. And you know what, we just learned a whole lot. You wouldn't believe it.

-Do you know what to do in a knife fight?
-Do you know what to do when someone throws a glass in your face? Let's say one of your drunk friends?
-Do you know what to do when you're cornered against a certain piece of furniture in a bar and someone throws a glass in your face? Let's say one of your drunk friends?
-Did you realize there would be two different maneuvers depending on the above situation? Well there are EVEN MORE of them. Maybe you should know a few.
-Did you realize that pepper could be thrown in your eyes during a fight in a restaurant and then you would be blinded? Permanently blinded?
-Are you aware that if someone has just sliced open your wrist in a knife fight, that you can squirt the blood in their eyes and then they would be blinded? Temporarily blinded? Maybe you didn't think of that.
-Are you aware that every one of your friends will attack you at some point in your life whether it be with their foot to your groin or hotsauce in your eyes or a lamp in your face?
-Do you know that violence is not the answer?

Someday I will document his life story. But I fear the world is not yet ready for BAS RUTTEN: TWO EYES FOR AN EYE.

Thursday, December 17, 2009

the blog be real confusin'

If I could choose one comic strip to represent my blog, it would be thus. I didn't draw it but I totally wish I did.

click on it to view in all its glory

Please check out Kate Beaton's other work, cuz it's awesome (so awesome). And cuz I have nothing else to offer.